Tuesday, January 18, 2011


Wow, has it really been over a month since my lost post.  I have been horrible about blogging, taking pictures, keeping in contact with others, etc..Please forgive me!  I will make this a hodge-podge post..updating you on just about everything! 


Mr. Cayden is 15.5 months old!  He is toddling around everywhere, and I think he enjoys making messes out of everything.  He sure keeps us on our toes.  He doesn't talk with real words...just A LOT of jibber jabber, however he sure is a smart boy.  He can show you his hair, eyes, toes (his favorite!), belly, nose, tongue, teeth, and occasionally his ears.  He loves showing us "choo, choo" with his arm.  He can  sign more, please, eat, thank-you, milk, and sorry.  He will say bye-bye, bath, dada, mama, and yes.  He absolutely loves bath time..he is a natural fish.  We started parent/child swim classes again, and he loves it!!  He has been working on kicking, scooping, blowing bubbles, jumping off the edge, and going under!  We have transitioned into taking "big boy" naps.  I know when the twins arrive, I won't be able to hold him while he falls asleep.  He transitioned very well.  Somedays, I think he lays and talks to himself more than he naps, but he seems to enjoy the time alone.  My boy is growing up so fast, and I don't even know where the time went. 

~The Twins~

For those that may have missed the Thanksgiving blog post a few months back, we are expecting TWINS in June.  We have had 3 US's, and they are both growing and looking great.  We were hoping for a sneak peek at genders a week ago, but the technician said she couldn't give us a 100%  look, so she didn't even peek :(  We are nearly 16 weeks along all ready..once again..where does time go?  We have our next appointment on Febuary 7th.  We don't have an official US scheduled, but our Dr stated that he will probably pull his machine in to get a good look at heartbeats.  I will definetly be asking him to take a good look at genders.  To be honest, if we were only having one baby, I wouldn't be finding out the gender, but I am thinking with two babies and a 20 month old...we better be prepared! 
I have had all the normal pregnancy symptoms..nausea, tiredness, headaches..etc.  The headaches have been the worst.  I have about 4/day. I felt the first for sure movement today!! I am excited to see how different twin movement is compared to a singleton.   I will do my best to update as we progress further into the pregnancy. 

These are the twins at 5 days after conception...isn't it amazing!!!

~ Grief Journey~

Yes, I still grieve over losing Braxton.  The time between "episodes" is further and further between, but I still have my days.  January leading up to his birthday are the hardest for me.   I had some really terrible dreams a few weeks ago that literally left me crying all day long.  I dreamt that I was in the operating room watching his birth.  I wanted so badly to help him, but something was holding me back and making me watch the awful scene.  It left me wondering if there was really that much panic in the operating room that day....I guess I will never know :(   I miss my little guy more than ever. 

On a brighter note, we try and do something special every year on his birthday.  God really laid it on my heart about a year ago, to do something special for the hospital and other families that experience infant loss.  I was stubborn in answering God's call...sometimes bitterness gets the best of me.  However, when God wants something done, he doesn't give up!  I am very excited to say that we are making "Memory Boxes" for other families.  We are excited about the boxes and the opportunity to give back in Braxton's name.  My plan is to donate the boxes on Braxton's birthday ( I know it will be hard wakling through the labor and delivery doors on that day, but I also know that God's peace will surround us!) 


We had a pretty good holiday season.  I am not a fan of constantly being on the go, and being pregnant made it worse.  I was exhausted for a week after all the festivities.  Cayden enjoyed Christmas.  He would open one gift play with it for awhile and then move on to the next.  We have enough toys to keep a daycare occupied! 

We were in bed by 10:30 on New Year's Eve...I know, I know..BORING!  We are excited to see what the New Year has in store for us!

~Prayer Requests~

I know a lot of couples who are currently undergoing fertility treatments.  It is my hope that this is the year for babies!!  Please pray for those that are waiting for God's perfect timing. 

I think that just about covers everything.  Short, sweet, and to the point!  I have so much on my mind about life, but I just can't find the right words to blog about it now.
Our first picture as a family of 6!!  (Zoom in...look close...Braxton's footprints are on my bracelet.)


Anonymous said...

Awesome update. Once those twins arrive, I imagine it will be harder and harder to keep up with the blog. :)
Thanks for keeping all of "us" in your thoughts and prayers. Your story provides much inspiration for me.

Hugs, Amy

A Wife and Her Coach said...

I know you do not know who I am but I have been following you for about a year now. I am Annie Shaw's cousin-in-law. I stumbled upon your blog one day while looking at her blog. Even though I don't know you I think of your story often and pray for you. I hope you don't mind if I follow your blog.
Amber Russell

Paige said...

SO glad to hear from you!! I am so happy that the babies are growing well...and that Cayden is doing so great too! This is such a fun time...seems like Callyn learns something everyday!!

CaSondra Shim said...

I just found your blog and I am excited to see your pregnant with twins. I am a Baby loss mom also and we lost Jaden in July and are still on the journey of trying to concieve our first rainbow baby. Congrts

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