Thursday, August 27, 2009

38 days and counting....

I can't even begin to describe the love I have for this child I am carrying. He makes me happy every day. I just love that I can feel every flip, kick, and turn. I wish I could share with his daddy and his grandparents all the wonderful moves he makes, but he has a way of getting "still" when someone else is watching!!! Makes me feel special that he allows me to enjoy every moment and movement. His hiccups make me giddy. His turns make me dizzy. His kicks make me proud. He just makes me happy.

The anxieties of the delivery day are beginning to mount. I feel secure with him "inside." I know that he is safe right now. I am scared to even go to the hospital. I am putting off my "to-do" list until we get within 2 weeks of delivery. I am hesistant about preparing anything. For some this fear seems odd, but I can't fathom preparing again and being let down. I am struggling with putting full trust in God right now. I am constantly reminded of how I prepared last time and then had to tear it all back apart. I know this is satan trying to defeat me, and I will not be defeated. Jesse is battling anxieties himself as well, so to say the least our home is a bit on edge these days.

We will make it. God will see us through. God will not leave us. He is one step ahead.

The Lord Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. (Deuteronomy 31:8)





11 comments:

Courtney said...

So excited to see pictures of your new precious boy! You are so strong, you will do great!

Anonymous said...

Gosh, I can't believe you are so close. It doesn't seem like so long ago we were both praying for this miracle and it is coming true! I pray for some peace of mind for you and for a safe and pleasant delivery! You deserve a blessed experience.

Lisa said...

It seems like yesterday when we heard the exciting news of you expecting!! I am so anxious to see your sweet little boy. Continue to keep the faith and put your trust in God and all things will work out for the good.

Hugs,
Lisa

Anonymous said...

Don't even mention the enemys name, because when you do that, he gets a little more powerful. Everytime you start to fear or have bad thoughts tell satan out loud, leave me alone! I will not listen to your lies! Hey, it works for me. Continue to give God the glory! I love you. Can't wait to see your little one!

Amie

Amanda Hoyt said...

I'm praying for ya'll, Destiny.
Hugs,
Amanda

A. said...

Oh Destiny! I've been following you since the beginning. You are a true success story in the name of the Lord. You are so close and I pray for strength and peace in these last few weeks until you meet your son.

Anonymous said...

I came across your story not to long after I had my 2nd daughter I remember from the beginning and crying. I could never imagine a loss like you have had. I was so excited when I read your post announcing you were pregnant again. I wish you the best of luck!!

The Cantlons said...

Still praying for you over here. . .I can't wait to see your beautiful baby boy (or to see the joy on yours & Jesse's faces when you finally meet this wonderful blessing from God!). Keep thinking positive thoughts. God will get you through this. . Just remember that he will be there with you the whole way! Miss you!

Buttercup said...

Continuing to pray with you.

Candi said...

you are such a brave and strong woman, and very shortly, you will be holding your baby boy safely in you arms! CONGRATS!!

Anonymous said...

Destiny, I can remember the first time I came across your blog. I love our faith and strength. Just remember that when you feel weak, God will carry you. You will do great with everything - just keep believing!

-Kristi in IA

 
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